I'm Katya. Or Kathryn. Or Kate. 18. Senior in HS/Sophomore in college. I write, mostly jumbled up journals and the occasional short stories, take pictures, have a passion for music, dance, read classic literature...and overthink situations. That's it...enjoy my stream of consciousness. :)
Pics of moi
25 DEEP Questions.
- 1. What is more difficult for you, looking into someones eyes when you are telling someone how you feel, or looking into someones eyes when they are telling you how they feel?
- When I'm telling them how I feel.
- 2. Think of the last time you were REALLY angry. WHY were you angry? Do you still feel the same way?
- I was really angry at myself and a guy for letting myself go like that and simply letting him take advantage of my feelings the way he did. I got so pissed I punched my wall, repeatedly. If I think and ponder on it long enough yes I can get really angry about it again.
- 3. You are on a flight from Honolulu to Chicago non-stop. There is a fire in the back of the plane. You have enough time to make ONE phone call. Who do you call? What do you tell them?
- My mother. I call my mother and tell her that I love her. Because...she's the most important person in my life. She's the one person who I know will never hurt or disappoint me. Ever.
- 4. You are at the doctor’s office and he has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? What do you do with your remaining days? Would you be afraid?
- I would be upset...but at least I'm leaving this horrible world with these horrible people. I'll spend a day with the ones I love the most, one person per day, and probably move to Seattle much earlier, walk around the campus...make the most of the future that I thought and planned to have and just take in all the goodness that I can.
- 5. You can have one of the following two things. Which do you choose? Why? Love and Trust. Trust. Because trusting someone means more than love...if you trust someone it automatically means you care for them and those feelings may evolve.
- 6. You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late even once more, you are fired. Do you take the time to save the dogs life? Why or Why not? Of course I have time. Fuck work, I probably hate my job anyways. Save the damn dog.
- 7. Would you rather be hurt by the one you trust the most or the one you love the most?
- Trust the most. When trust is broken...when everything you believed in is proved wrong...that's what hurts the most.
- 8. Your best friend confesses that he/she has feelings for you more than just friendship. He/she is falling in love with you. What do you (or did you) do/say?
- Um. I tell him that I've been hurt by him one too many times and I've been fucked over by him one too many times so I don't think I can ever trust him again. And move to Seattle. So that's that.
- 9. Think of the last person who you know that died. You have the chance to give them 1 hour of life back, but you have to give up one year of yours. Do you do it? Why or Why not?
- Of course...the last person I knew that died was my grandpa and I would give ANYTHING, if it be a year or two years or 10 years to talk to him for an hour and ask him so many questions. I wouldn't waste a second.
- 10. Are you the kind of friend that you would want to have as a friend?
- I don't think so. I really kind of hate myself at the moment.
- 11. Does love = sex?
- No. Loveless sex is meaningless and a waste of time. Love can be love without sex. I've experienced it...I've loved someone for a long amount of time...and never kissed him. Or slept with him.
- 12.Your boss tells your coworker that they have to let them go because of work shortage, and they are the newest employee. You have been there much longer. Your coworker has a family to support and no other means of income. Do you go to your boss and offer to leave the company? Why or Why not?
- 13.When was the last time you told someone HONESTLY how you felt regardless of how difficult it was for you to say? Who was it? What did you have to tell the person?
- I don't know...honestly, I remember telling the person I cared most for that I loved him. It was really fucking difficult to get to the point. I don't want to elaborate.
- 14. What would be (or what was) harder for you to tell a member of the opposite sex, you love them or that you do not love them back?
- Being the selfish bitch that I am, probably saying that I love them. If someone were to tell me they loved me and I didn't feel the same way...I'd just brush them off and not talk to them for a while. I know...I'm horrible.
- 15. What do you think would be the hardest thing for you to give up? Why would it be hard to lose?
- I don't know. I haven't had something...materialistic or otherwise, that I have been so attached to that I couldn't give up. I'm a free spirittttt.
- 16. Excluding romantic love, when was the last time you told someone you loved them. Who were they to you?
- Rachel. My best friend. (:
- 17. If there was one moment and one time in the last month what would you change and why?
- I would change May 24th. Eeeeeeeeeeee-because.
- 18.Imagine it is a dark night, you are alone, it is raining outside, you hear someone walking around outside your window. WHO do you wish was there with you?
- Anyone, honestly. That sounds frightening as hell.
- 19. Would you give a homeless person CPR if they were dying? Why or Why not?
- No...no.
- 21.You are holding onto your grandmother’s hand and the hand of a newborn that you do not know as they hang over the edge of a cliff. You have to let one go to save the other. Who do you let fall to their death? What was your rationale for making the decision?
- Grandmother. Common sense. That baby has a whole life ahead of them.
- 22. Are you old fashioned?
- I think so. I consider myself old fashioned.
- 23. When was the last time you were nice to someone and did NOT expect anything in return for it?
- I don't know. Don't remember.
- 24.Which would you choose, true love with a guarantee of a broken heart, or never loved at all? Why?
- First one. Because love is an amazing thing...
- 25.If you could do anything or wish anything, what would it be?
- That I could find someone to share my love with, to share my passion for art, for literature, for music with...just someone to fit in and someone who won't screw me over. Someone that I will have no doubts with. Is that too much to ask for? Some trust and intimacy?
It’s just upsetting, and disappointing. I shouldn’t lie to myself, or anyone for that matter. So I’ll just be straight up. It’s extremely hurtful, and I’m slightly distraught, but I’m going to have to be okay with it…even though I’ve done absolutely nothing to deserve this. If anything, I’ve done everything to deserve the complete opposite. I guess I’ll never learn, and I guess I’ll never be skinny, nor will it ever be okay for me to listen to non-classical music. Sigh. I have nothing else to say.
